tours france, the newfound love of my life

so I'm finally abroad.

It's been a wild first ten days. I left America on the 31st, and today is september 10th. I've been here ten days, and it already feels like a lifetime, a lifestyle. Tours is probably the most charming city I've ever been to, and I'm feeling so utterly grateful to be here. I wanted an authentic French experience, I think that's what I'll be getting. I've met so many amazing people already too, the other exchange students seem just as eager as I am to connect and to explore. I'm really excited for what the semester has in store for me.

vieux tours, la loire, et tours centre

Turns out I got really lucky with location in picking my residence building. I chose the building that I'm in because another student from BGSU studied here and told me he really enjoyed living there, and now that I'm here I can see why. I'm in the heart of the city center, and across the street from the building I'll be having most of my courses in, which is SO CONVENIENT.

From my room I can comfortably walk to three or four different churches/cathedrals, the medieval center of the city called Place Plumereau (or Place Plum for the locals), the Loire river, and as many adorable restaurants, bars and cafes as my heart desires. I am thriving. There's also a marketplace near me called "Les Halles" that has fresh bread, meats, produce and cheese every single day. This is my life now!

But as much as I'm loving it here, I did begin to fall into some self-doubt. You see, most of my new friends aren't Americans- they're European, Canadian, Australian, or from the UK- and in spending time with them I've started to feel like being American has me at a disadvantage.

First of all, our current government is an absolute joke, and everyone knows it and constantly points it out to me. Yes, I know that Trump is an insensitive and incompetent asshole, please quit tying that to me. Every time the news or politics has been brought up, I've been generalized to the whole American public.

"You guys are so racist, your country is ruining lives, you guys don't know how to run your country" Now I am not a wholeheartedly patriotic person, but I'm also not directly responsible for the actions of my government. Maybe it's that I'm the only American in this new group dynamic, or maybe it's that what's wrong with America is so prevalent that it's hard to explain that so many of us are actively against everything the current president and his administration stand for.

But it's not just politically that I've been feeling insecure about, it's my educaiton in general. Back home, I consider myself a good student. I worked hard, I got good grades, and I felt as though I was a cultured person from reading and attending museums and lectures and such. Here though, I feel so stupid sometimes. Being abroad has made me realize how truly isolated America allows itself to be- even though we are everpresent in the lives and media of the rest of the world, we barely take time to look outside of ourselves. My new friends know the history of eachother's countries and can connect and discuss over past Canadian goverment officials and Australian media and they all speak multiple languages or have much better skills in the french language than I do. They also know all about US politics, media and culture- I feel that I have nothing to share. Our country is so publicized, so globally saturating, that I have nothing to bring to the cultural table. It's made me feel that I'm somehow not smart enough to be abroad, and I've been having a lot of trouble with that.

But I'm excited to learn. I'm excited to taste, and to travel and to read everything I can. I want to come home better, smarter, more globally engaged. I want to make an effort to deserve this opportunity, to be worthy of all that it's already brought to my life.

I don't know how often I'll be blogging, it's tough determining what my days will look like as I don't have any set class schedule right now. But I'm hoping to write more and more often. until next time